The Unexpected Power of Surrender: A Pause Studio Story

When we opened Pause Studio in January 2020, we were full of optimism. We signed a seven-year lease, personally guaranteeing it, confident in our vision for an in-person mindfulness community. This wasn't a decision we took lightly. We didn't have any startup funding, nor are we trust fund babies. I had just left my job as a social worker, and Rena her work in non-profits. We were stepping into the unknown, driven by our passion and belief in the power of mindfulness.

Then, just two months later, the pandemic hit, turning our world upside down.

Fear and anxiety overwhelmed us as our carefully laid plans crumbled. At first, we desperately clung to our original vision, resisting the change and hoping for a quick return to "normal." But the harder we held on, the more difficult it became to adapt.

It was in this moment of crisis that we discovered the unexpected power of surrender.

The idea of surrendering can feel counterintuitive, even frightening. Our instinct is often to tighten our grip when faced with uncertainty. But we learned that surrendering doesn't mean giving up. Instead, it's about letting go of our attachment to how things "should" be and opening ourselves to new possibilities.

When we finally loosened our grip on our original plan, we found the flexibility to pivot. Moving our community online opened new ways to connect and grow that we hadn’t considered before. What first felt like a disaster became an opportunity for innovation and expansion. We also found silver linings: when Rena’s dad was diagnosed with brain cancer, we were able to move back to Montana to be with him in his final months, and we discovered new ways to share stress reduction and resilience training with businesses worldwide. Overnight, we grew from a local Portland community to an international network, thanks to our members welcoming friends and family from around the world.

This experience taught us a profound lesson: true strength often lies in our ability to let go. As the poet Rumi beautifully puts it:

"Try not to resist the changes that come your way. Instead, let life live through you." 

These words took on new meaning for us as we navigated our studio's transformation.

By surrendering our need for control, we conserved energy and gained clarity. We were able to respond to the crisis with wisdom and creativity rather than fear and rigidity. We were even able to feel excited about other unexpected possibilities that might surface.

This principle extends far beyond our studio's story. In our daily lives, we often struggle against reality, causing ourselves unnecessary suffering. But when we practice surrender - releasing our resistance to what is - we create space for new solutions to emerge. 

Of course, there are many circumstances when surrendering is not the most skillful action – and can even be harmful. We need the energy of resistance to fight injustice, protect our boundaries, and stand up for our values. Our practice can help us grow our discernment for when each is appropriate. Sometimes what is most powerful (and needed) is resistance.

The next time you face an unexpected challenge or change, try this:

1. Pause and take a deep breath

2. Notice where you're holding tension in your body

3. Soften and let go with your exhale

4. Ask yourself: "What would it feel like to surrender in this moment?"

You might be surprised by the sense of possibility that emerges when you loosen your grip on how things "should" be. You might take this line of inquiry one step further and ask yourself, Where does this "should" even come from?

Remember, surrender is a practice. It takes time to cultivate. But with each small letting go, we create more room for life to flow through us in beautiful and unexpected ways.

With love on the journey,

Ryan

Pause Cofounder